I was at the drug store today and the clerk said, “You just blow in here like a little ball of sunshine don’t you?”
I said, “What do you mean?”
She laughed and said, “You come in here and brighten up the place, you make people smile, you get them talking to one another…you are just so positive! How do you do that every day?”
I leaned in and said, “I’ll tell ya a secret…that’s what we are all here to do but I am just one of the few people who get it.”
However, I didn’t use to get it, in fact, I was about as far away from “getting it” as someone could possibly be.
I had to go through the pits of hell until I could get it, until I could see that what I was doing was wrong and the way I was acting was the wrong way to treat people.
Now, I am a different person.
Let me tell you something, I cannot understand why we, as human beings, walk by one another without speaking to each other.
It only takes a second to speak to people, to say hello, good morning, good afternoon, good evening, Happy Halloween, Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, Happy Birthday, how are you today…whatever! Speak to each other!
It only takes a second to hold the door for someone, to offer an elderly person help with their groceries, to take a grocery cart back for someone, to let someone in line go ahead of you when they only have a few things and you have a cart full, to ask someone if they are doing okay…how hard is it?!?
Ya know, I have been through hell and I know what it’s like to be angry, be unhappy, and be mad at the world. I know what it’s like to be a bully and walk around with a chip on your shoulder. I used to be a rude person, a hateful, evil person who treated people like dirt. In short, I was a nasty, vindictive, bitch of a shrew. Do you know what that meant? It meant I was an unhappy person.
But I didn’t know what real unhappiness was until 2006…that is when my hell began and plunged me into a dark and dusty place and it took me almost four years to find my way out.
In that awful place, I lost myself for many years then suddenly I saw the light and I began to grow and change into another person.
No matter how hard it was for me during that time, I am now forever grateful for having gone through it.
I know what it’s like to be depressed and have suicidal thoughts haunt my mind and my sleep every day and every night and I know what it’s like to be alone. I know what it’s like to be scared of the next day and what I might do to get through or not get through it.
I also know what it’s like to wake up breathing and curse the fact that you are still alive.
It wasn’t until I went though hell and hit rock bottom that I was mowed down over and over again and I had no where to go but up, did I change. I CHANGED!!!
Rock bottom is the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.
And believe me, I was a firm believer that people DID NOT change. I didn’t believe it until it happened to me.
Now I speak to everyone, I want to make people happy, to make them smile and to feel good about themselves. I want to be the person they think of when they are having a bad day. Think of me and smile and know that it will all be okay.
If I can change and make a difference in this world, so can you.
We need to realize that we are all in this together. We need to get along and make it work.
Be the person who makes a difference instead of just taking up space.
I am not ashamed to admit the kind of person I used to be, I tell you so you can see that it is possible for people to “get it” after going through such pain.
I learned to embrace the changes in my life and I chose to use them as opportunities to grow. You can too!
I know there will never be peace on Earth and not everyone will magically get along but we can do our part, even if it’s a small part, while we are here.
So the next time you pass someone on the street, speak to them and watch their reaction. I guarantee you they will smile and in turn, you will feel good too! ♥